Three Careers, One Calling: How Sufyan Cares for Both His Mother and Himself

At age 36, Sufyan has embarked on three different careers as he copes with depression while being a full-time caregiver to his mom with type 2 diabetes. Having to quit his job early this year, he now spends most of his time

with his mom, bringing her to medical appointments, watching her in case she falls and helping to administer daily medication.

His own struggles with mental health first began when he had suicidal thoughts while going through demanding dragon-boat training alongside attaining a chemical engineering diploma. He sought help from IMH, and was given antidepressants. Upon graduating, he took on a job in oil and gas, but work became difficult as the medication made him drowsy.

With a keen interest in sports, he took on a sports-science degree, joining Certis Group to provide fitness training services for Basic Military Training; later, a clinic assistant at a GP clinic. Two years ago, he joined the National Kidney Foundation as a therapy assistant, working alongside Occupational Therapists (OT) for patient recovery. During this time, his mom’s condition continued to worsen, and she was hospitalised frequently - the longest being a 3-month period from December to February this year.

As a Muslim who believes that caring for his parents is only right, he had no choice but to put his budding career on pause. Leaving his father as the sole breadwinner, he feels the heat of both his sudden increase in caregiving duties and financial strain. His sister, 32, has decided not to help out. "Being strong is the only option,” he says.

Initially, he planned to grow his career in the medical field and go into OT, as he enjoys helping people regain their mobility and resume everyday life. Strapped with caregiving and the need to be home, he has decided to build his own business selling water filters through affiliate marketing. Over the years, his mental health has improved, as he copes through his self-care activities like walking and swimming, a small taste of his previous triathlon days.

He is also one of the longest-time attendees of Caregivers Alliance Limited’s Circles of Resilience programme for youths navigating mental health issues, as he finds comfort in sharing his struggles with like-minded peers, a familiar routine set up for the past two years.

Despite every curveball, Sufyan continues to bite the bullet and step up for his family. He hopes to establish himself as an advocate for caregiving and mental health, as he finds new ways to move forward.